Small Talk
I remember when I was first learning how to talk to women, I was deathly afraid of small talk. All of my mentors had warned me not to get stuck in boring small talk. So I steered clear of it.
Because of my reluctance to make small talk with women, I would instead, have long, intense deep conversations with them. Which almost always ended up with me in the friend zone.
I would create way too much rapport with women, and I would be completely afraid to break it. This continually lead to me wasting hours talking to a girl, without ever creating one drop of sexual desire.
After watching a bunch of my more ‘natural’ friends talk to women, I began to notice something that caught my attention. The friends of mine who were successful with women, were almost always using small talk to create attraction.
Except their small talk was anything but boring. It was fun, amusing, flirtatious, and exciting. And the women were eating it up.
Yes, these guys had mastered the art of small talk.
The Art of Small Talk
Small talk is truly an art form. While most people think making small talk just means talking about the weather, sports, or other ‘neutral’ topics, it actually can be just about anything. And can be quite powerful for building attraction if done right.
Here are suggestions for making small talk with women
1. Create Multiple Conversation Threads
Small talk becomes awkward when the two of you begin to sense that you have nothing to talk about other than the weather. But if you immediately introduce several ‘threads’ into the conversation, you are free to jump around from topic to topic, creating a sense of familiarity with the other person.
If you’re chatting with a woman about her job, drop in conversation threads about your last vacation or how you like to take your dog to the park. Anything that allows her to see that as a three dimensional person, and not just someone she is struggling to talk to.
2. Assume Rapport Right From the Start
The men and women who are the best at small talk, are usually the ones you feel most comfortable around. So what do these people do to make you feel so comfortable around them? Simple. They talk to you as if the two of you have been friends for years.
Instead of putting on that “phony” vibe we tend to muster when talking to a stranger, just simply talk to the strangers in the same tonality and conversational language that you would talk to your best friend with.
3. Be prepared to do Most of the Talking to Start
If you initiate a conversation with a woman, you must be ready to carry most of the small talk for the beginning of the conversation. This is because she isn’t yet warmed up.
Its like when you and your friends get into the “vibe” and suddenly everyone is pitching in different jokes and stuff… you needed time to warm up. She does to. Remember, you approached her. Before you approached her she could have had a million other things on her mind. So you need to slowly get her to open up to you, and kick start her social vibe.
If you follow these three tips for perfecting the art of small talk, you’ll be much more likely to have good conversations with the women that you’re approaching.
==> Click here to learn more about mastering “sexual” small talk
